All times listed in Atlantic Time Zone (+4 hours ahead of LA time)
I am out of my mind with nerves.
I don’t remember feeling nearly this nervous before Game 7 of the 2017 World Series, which was their only potentially clinching game that year. I remember going for a walk to kill the time about an hour before 1st pitch, but I wasn’t nervous like this. I think this means it’s because I know in my heart of hearts that they can absolutely do this tonight.
But I don’t want to think that far ahead, don’t want to let the mind wander to places it doesn’t quite yet belong.
Seriously, how does one NOT let her or his mind wander – to the possible game-winning scenarios, to visions of teammates embracing after years of blood, sweat and tears, to Clayton Kershaw finally silencing his critics?
For this fan, anyway, it’s impossible.
I shouldn’t do it – the players and Doc all seem to be resolute in their beliefs that they are only focusing on winning a baseball game – but I’m no professional, I’m a fan who has been ruled by her heart for 39 years of baseball fandom, and I just can’t help it.
I’m trying to keep my mind occupied but I’ve taken a week’s vacation off from work in preparation of this very thing – either mentally preparing for a World Series game or watching a World Series game – so I don’t have that to distract me. It would be impossible to really focus on anything else anyway…this could be the day I’ve been waiting for all of my double-digit years since first having my heart broken by baseball when I was 9 back in 1981. There is no precedent to this feeling for me, so I can only handle it like I do anything else – one foot in front of the other.
Maybe I’ll try a nap instead.
Well that didn’t work.
Access Sportsnet starts in 15 minutes; I think I’ll just keep that on until game time, immerse myself in all things Dodgers, and let the rest of the evening flow as it will…
Seriously, I am absolutely out of my mind with nerves.
First pitch in 8 minutes.
I flash back to the first Dodgers game of the 2014 season and how I really only came across it on TV due to the weird time difference between Moncton, NB, Canada (Atlantic Time Zone) and Australia, where the Dodgers were starting the season earlier than normal due to the travel time needed to fly all that way. It occurs to me that if they had played a regular opening day that year and I hadn’t been up very, very early that morning and desperately seeking a distraction from my personal life like I was at the time, I may never have followed the road that has led me to where I am today.
Maybe I wouldn’t be sick with anxiety over a baseball game, but boy, life sure would be boring.
Being a Dodgers fan over the last 7 seasons and falling in love with this team along the way has been the experience of a lifetime, and I know that won’t change regardless of what happens these next 2 nights. I know I am where I belong and I’m not going anywhere; this though – this is all about the players. They’ve fought hard, have earned this.
It is time. Time to win a ball game.
Time for the Dodgers finally win the last game of the year.